So here we are in the middle of January…..all I can say is urghhhhhh!! Yes I have had the winter blues or is it menopausal blues or maybe just bitchy blues, I don't know but I have been so fed up with myself, for it.
So, when my daughter went back to school last week I had planned to do so much, lists, lists and more bloody lists. I was going to sort this and that out, super organise my house, plan my business year, well at least a few months (I have just finished listening to The 12 Week Year by Brian P. Moran and Michael Lennington, it`s that good I am about to start listening again), get more clients and basically be a super women…..ha ha ha !!! I hear echoing around me!
I broke my toe at the end of the first week of January and I was a little immobile and in a load of flipping pain for a while, so yes I was feeling sorry for myself and extremely fed up with having to hobble around, like a old crippled penguin and not do all the things that I enjoy doing and note to my family, I don't mean laundry, cooking and generally picking up after you lot.
So ok I've moped for about a week and half now, I was cross with myself for feeling this way when I see all the other women out there storming ahead with their lives. Then it dawns on me, I`m not Super Women, I am a REAL Women and praise be given for that !!!!! There is nothing wrong with being real, true, depressed, stressed, upset, angry, crazy, lovely, kind, sexy or any of those other emotions that we may feel very often, even daily or in some cases hourly.
So here I am in my humble studio, writing my meek and imperfect blog, embracing my madness, badness, crankiness as well as my beauty, kindness and goodness. I am what I am, in whatever moment I find myself in and that my friends is truly living in the moment, try it, I dare you.
This is really appropriate timing for me to discover this, at the beginning of this year. Ok I haven't made any resolutions, lose weight, complete the book, travel the world etc. like I have done in the past but I have promised myself that this year will be different for me. This year, 2018 will be a good or should I say great year for me. I could go into the back story of this revelation but I think that it is best saved for another time. So realising that I am ok, warts, wobbles and the whole of me, at this time is fantastic. I am happy not to be perfect, yes I am totally bonkers, love me or loathe me, its none of my business.
Also coming to terms with my imperfections whether physically or emotionally (ok I'm not going to say mentally, though some will, I know who you are) is so beneficial and needed in my business. I love beauty, whether its the beauty of a sunrise, a elegantly crafted piece of furniture or the beauty of a person and I am not referring to just the way they look. Beauty can be a sparkle in the eye, a giggle, the strength of someone or their kindness. I am so lucky that I can bring that beauty out through my photography and I am truly thankful for the talent that I have been given. That is why one of my goals/wishes this year is to give back. I want to help more women and girls see their true beauty and help give them strength and confidence. There are many who suffer for long periods of their lives and maybe take wrong turns or just don't live to their full potential, for whatever the reason I would like to engage and help in the best way I know how, because I have been there too and it is truly a dark place.
It seems that the tide is turning for women once again, we as a whole seem to be moving forward and saying no to things that have be happening forever. With women in the media standing up and saying “no more will these things happen and be covered up”. Women coming forward and telling their stories and embracing their scars, it is a shinning light for me to understand and love my whole being and be able to say ” I am fabulous and mean it”. At the recent Golden Globes Oprah Winfrey said ” Speaking your truth is the most powerful tool we all have” and I now at the wonderful age of 46 believe this, my truth is my truth and its noting to be ashamed of or hide from. For me that applies to my past but also how I am feeling today, tonight and tomorrow.
So for all you REAL women out there, who wobble in the wrong places, who shout when they shouldn't, who forget things, swear, get it wrong, survive, smile at strangers, sing to your dogs, forget to put your bra on, love too much, come over and join me on the weirdo bench. Super women you are welcome as well, but I may disappoint you.
So here's wishing you all, women, men, your children and your furry babies a most fabulous and crazy filled 2018. Remember there will be ups and downs and roundabouts, you will be happy, sad and many other emotions and that is ok, be and feel them all and don't be ashamed of it.
I would urge you this month to take time to…..1) Read or listen to The 12 Week Year by Brian P. Moran and Michael Lenningtonhttps://12weekyear.com/product/12-week-year-book-new-edition/ and 2) Listen to or read Oprah Winfrey`s Golden Globe speech.https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fN5HV79_8B8 Both have inspired and moved me both professionally and personally over the last few weeks and all I can say is “Thankyou”.
My chosen quote to inspire me this month is………… ” Faith is taking the first step even when you can`t see the whole staircase” Martin Luther King Jr.